This year is my last year of middle school. There’s a major exam round the corner and everyone is stressful preparing for it. We have to get good scores for all the subjects because which high school we can enter all depends on the grades. Most of the extra local activities and clubs have all stopped in order for all students to have sufficient time to prepare for their exams. But, not for the dance team because we have an upcoming year-end competition round the corner and that happens to fall on a weekday afternoon just a month before the exam. I took extra languages as well because of my interest in it. There’s an exam for that as well. Luckily, I was able to get an A grade which spared me for a re-test later. But, dance club was an issue. As time draws nearer, our instructor gets more lenient on us and practice hours just doesn’t end. Days of practice added from a day to two to three. I was finding it stressful mentally and physically. I told my mom about it, but she said I shouldn’t be so irresponsible and back out last-minute and I should endure until the competition is over. Hating to lose out and the unfairness of me backing out alone leaving the others hanging in the air urged me to hold on. I was out early morning and back late at night due to practices. My body couldn’t take the stress much longer. I was giving myself more stress because I didn’t have sufficient time to prepare myself for the mock exam papers coming up for the next week. It happened to fall on just three weeks before the dance competition.

Day and night I studied when I have the time. To save time, dad offered to drive me to school. I took the offer gladly. I had breakfast with dad each morning at school since then since he drove me and he set off to work after which. Two to three hours of sleep isn’t helping and worse, it wasn’t even peaceful sleep. I took the mock papers and I didn’t manage to score well for the papers. I’m not a smart kid, but I worked hard for my credits. Having insufficient sleep is causing me to lose my concentration. I spoke to dad about this over breakfast one day. He said he understood what I’m going through now because he went through the same thing during his middle school. I felt a little comforted at his words. Mom decided to enroll me in tuition classes to help me in getting better grades. Whatever reasons I gave was of no acceptance for rejecting those class. I went for it and thus leaving me no time to self-study at all. I didn’t complain. The day for the mock exam came and I took it. Teachers marked them the very day and gave it back to us to go through our mistakes and learn from it. For those who didn’t score well, they are all to stay back after school for an hour of extra classes. As most of the students have extra tuition lessons, lunch time was cut down to 30 minutes for those who needed to stay for extra lessons. I was one of those. I needed to stay late for at least 3 days and a day out of those three days was the day I need to go for dance practice and the remaining two weekdays were the usual practice days as well. Five days of extra tuition lessons outside school, three days for extra lessons in school and three days odd dance club. Each and every hour was filled with things to do.

Days passed and my body couldn’t manage to take it. I pretended to be sick for a day and took a day off dance to rest and clear my mind. I went to school and extra lessons as per normal. More days passed and I have been giving reasons for the last two weeks not to go for dance practice. It didn’t get permitted of course. I was asked to stay in and watch so that I won’t drag the whole team down when I resume practice. But, I never had the intention to. All I wanted was to drop out of dance. The dance instructor picked me. I didn’t want to be part of the competition. But, because of my height and I’m good I’m obligated. The instructor called my mom. Mom questioned me. I find all sorts of excuses and I lied for what I remembered to be the first time in my life. I give all sorts of reasons that I could and I had to put on an act. I thought I convinced my mom because she said to speak with the instructor about it. Next day, she took time off work and dropped by my school. I was so glad to see her. I could finally drop myself off dance club was the thought that I had. She approached the instructor and spoke to her.

“My mom wants to speak with you about my dance practices.”
“She does? I’ll speak with her while you should  get on with practices.”

I backed down, but stretch my ears to listen to it.

“Yes, yes, I’m aware. She told me about it.”
“… …”
“Yes, yes, I’m sorry about that. Yes… Yes…”
“… …”

The situation doesn’t seemed to be what I had expected, so I decided to approach with caution. I got near enough to them and my mom touch me on my shoulder. Everyone wasn’t practicing at all. They were all focused on the two adults. I could hear exactly what they were talking now. My mom was totally siding and believing what the instructor said which wasn’t true. All I did was find excuses to drop out of dance cub. My mom totally buy the instructor’s side of the story. I thought she’d side me and get me out of the club because studies are more important. This was definitely betrayal. I just explained everything to her clearly the night before and I certainly heard her promising me.

This is wrong; absolutely wrong. I poised myself. Waited for them to finish the talk. I told the instructor that I want to go back with my mom today and I was given the permission. She asked me to rest well for today. I didn’t start a conversation with my mom on the whole journey back. The betrayal I felt for a 16-year-old. I was angst and disappointed. That night I couldn’t sleep. I cried in my bed for what seemed to be the longest night in my 16 years of life.

I made a wish that night. “You betrayed me today. You’re perhaps never to be trusted. I won’t choose to tell you anything at all anymore. You broke what seemed to be a perfect family lifestyle for me. Caring parents and lovely home. You won’t ever be able to make up for today. You’ll regret, but won’t know the reason for you’re losing my trust.”

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